Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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