My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
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Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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