just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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