I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
