She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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