If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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