2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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