I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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