And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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