In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
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shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
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