The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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