i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
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