I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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