Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
