Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
