we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
