She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Randomize
