imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I need to wash the frat house off of me
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
