For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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