I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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