i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
i now understand why vodka
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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