I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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