Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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