I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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