My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize