In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
