I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I have aggressive nipples.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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