I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
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You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.