We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
