a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Randomize
