When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
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