so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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