I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
worst night to have a conscience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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