My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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