My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
