boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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