I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
