I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
i out mim tonsoeep
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