i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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