Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
