Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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