I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
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