Whoa Z and x make the same sound
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
