I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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