im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..