Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize