it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
