Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
