Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
