How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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