I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I DEMAND FORESKIN
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
